


Buzfeed's 10 Best Rumours

by TheIntelligentHufflepuff



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Cute, Fluff, Humour, I tried at least, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-09
Updated: 2016-04-09
Packaged: 2018-06-01 07:07:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6506920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheIntelligentHufflepuff/pseuds/TheIntelligentHufflepuff
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve's laid up, so Natasha decides to be a good friend and bring him clickbait. Meanwhile, Steve and Bucky continue to be adorable.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Buzfeed's 10 Best Rumours

**Author's Note:**

> Bear in mind, this was written in an hour and not beta'd. Not that I want to deter you!

"Hey!" Natasha- who had somehow entered the apartment while Steve was blinking-called, plopping down on to the sofa "What's up?" 

Steve raised an eyebrow, gesturing to his battered body. It would be fair to say that there were certain disadvantages to fighting robotic octopi without body armour. 

"Fair enough." Natasha laughed, taking a tablet out of her hoodie pocket with flourish "Luckily for you, I have entertainment." 

Natasha's eyes were sparkling, a slight upward twist to to the corners of her mouth. She was up to something.   
"What is it?" Steve asked, resigned to his fate. Theoretically, he could run away but it would hurt and he just wasn't in the mood. Anyway, if it was anything too awful Bucky would save him. Or laugh. It was 50/50. 

"Here I have-" Natasha paused for dramatic effect before continuing "Buzfeed's 10 Best Rumours About Captain America." 

"Oh God." Steve exhaled in horror.   
Natasha snickered, leaning up against the sofa's arm so that their feet tangled in the middle. 

"Number one- Captain America never existed and the man we see today is a lookalike bodybuilder." 

Steve laughed, before he stopped himself. Cracked ribs were no fun, super soldier or not.  
"Feels like it sometimes! But no."

"Number two- oh my...ok." Natasha raised an eyebrow exaggeratedly, adopting a stern tone that nevertheless belied her amusement "Captain America once had an orgy with no less than seven members of the French resistance." 

Steve's jaw dropped. Before he could reply, he heard Bucky yell from the kitchen, where he was preparing lunch "He'd better not!" 

"He didn't!" Steve called back, adding under his breath "But he did kiss Dernier once." 

Natasha screeched in laughter, almost dropping her tablet. 

"What is it? What did he say?" Bucky demanded, eyes narrowed suspiciously as he entered the living room with three plates of sandwiches. 

Natasha shook her head, miming zipping her lips shut. Bucky turned to Steve with an expectant look. 

He grimaced sheepishly "He was drunk, everyone else had gone to bed, he just kinda kissed me." 

Bucky squawked in betrayal "You traitor, Steve. I thought Dernier was straight. Wait." His eyes widened "He had a wife!" 

Steve snorted "He was. He did. Plus, you and I weren't even together then.."

Bucky considered for a moment before shrugging and positioning himself on the floor at Steve's head. 

Absentmindedly, Steve began to play with Bucky's long hair. 

"What's number three?"

Natasha hummed thoughtfully "This one's actually pretty accurate: Captain America and the Black Widow kissed." 

"Huh. D'you think someone recognised us?"

"In the mall? Nah. Well...Avengers superfan, maybe?" 

"Yeah, that's possible." 

"Just say number four." Bucky commanded uncomfortably. Steve leant to the side carefully in order to press a soft kiss to the top of Bucky's head; he melted slightly, raising his metal hand to squeeze Steve's. 

"That's cute, but do you wanna hear number four?" Natasha interrupted them. 

Steve poked her foot fondly "Go on." 

"Captain America's mother was a friend of Emily Pankhurst." 

Natasha looked hopefully to Steve.  
He shook his head "No, sorry. She was a suffragist, though- when I was nine or so she showed me her ribbons and gave me a lecture on how men were no better than women and would be nowhere without them." Steve chuckled lightly, tone turning wistful "Not that I thought that in the first place. She was amazing." 

"Sounds like my kind of woman." Natasha said, smiling approvingly. Something in Steve warmed at the thought that Natasha would like his mum. 

They paused for a minute, munching at their sandwiches but not disrupting the soft atmosphere. Soon, Natasha cleared her throat and introduced them to rumour number five- "Captain America initially refused the role of an Avenger." She looked up, a small furrow between her brows "You didn't, did you?"

"No. I was too pissed at people messing around with the Tesseract and too...I had reasons." Steve finished lamely, taking a vicious bite out of sandwich to avoid his friends' piercing and concerned gazes. 

"Moving on?" Bucky suggested pointedly. 

Natasha snorted "Number six- Captain America has actually been amongst us for many years but because the serum slowed his ageing we couldn't tell. Their evidence for this? A photo of someone who really doesn't look like you holding a trash can on Independence Day 1976." 

"They're reaching." Bucky commented. 

Natasha nodded, scrolling delicately down. She cleared her throat "Um, number seven is...look, I'm doing you a favour here, not that you ever listen to me, but...yeah you aren't going to listen to me." Natasha threw her hands up, relenting to herself "Basically it implies that you're racist, sexist, communist hating trash. I mean I myself am not endeared to the Soviet Union, but...yeah..." 

Bucky was glaring daggers at the tablet, back a tense line "Who said that?" 

Steve tugged lightly at his hair, wincing when his stitches pulled "Lots of people, Buck. It's Captain America, not me- although I guess I can be Captain America now. I couldn't before, though, and not when I was under." 

Bucky exhaled deeply, tilting his head back to look up at Steve "You are far too rational about this." 

"Eat your sandwich." 

"Eat yours, since I went to all the trouble of making it for your punk self."

"I am!" 

"Boys." Natasha interrupted them, cool amusement in her words "Number eight is nicer. Apparently you gave your helmet to a little German girl whose parents died in bombings." 

Steve smiled slowly "Yeah...yeah. I'd forgotten about that. She was carrying a satchel with a story book inside, and nothing else. We were on our way to storm a HYDRA base I think, and we met her along the road all by herself. Obviously," Steve laughed darkly "we were suspicious at first so I went to check it out and she just sort of started crying when she saw me because, to put it frankly, the allies killed her parents and I was dressed like an American flag." 

Steve took a deep breath, suddenly overwhelmed with emotion. It was costly to remember you and your allies were hurting in a war like that, so you tried your level best to forget. But that time...Steve couldn't.   
"So I was just sorta at a loss of what to do, but then I thought why not give her the helmet? It might help her at some point and it'll show that I don't mean any harm. She took it and stopped crying. I gave her my water and rations too." 

Natasha was staring at him with an odd expression on her face, more open than Steve had seen her since they crashed at Sam's during the DC fiasco so long ago. After a while, she spoke.

"Steve, I think you just single handedly restored my faith in humanity." 

Steve was still figuring out how to respond when Bucky smiled shyly at Natasha, offered a side long glance at Steve that was so full of admiration his heart clenched, and said "Yeah. He does that." 

Steve blinked hard, forcing himself to deal with his emotions. And by deal with them, he meant shove them aside for some point far, far in to the future. Healthy, he knew. 

Natasha smiled knowingly at him, and unlocked her tablet again "Number nine- Captain America is in to women and men." 

"I hope that's true," Bucky joked "Both for mine and Dernier's sakes!" 

Steve stuck his tongue out childishly at Bucky; Natasha rolled her eyes. 

"And finally, number ten. Captain America is madly in love with Bucky Barnes." 

"Now that," Steve proclaimed "Is definitely true." 

Bucky spun around and kissed Steve passionately on the mouth. 

"Sap." He smiled "I love you too."

**Author's Note:**

> Emily (or rather Emaline) Pankhurst was the founder of the English Suffragette movement. She later handed the reins over to her daughters. The Suffragists were more passive in their methods than the Suffragettes- I feel like Sarah Rogers probably had less of a 'punching this may solve my problems' attitude than Steve, but she was probably one of the more vocal/verging on rowdy Suffragists when riled up. Also, I have no idea if the Suffragists were called the Suffragists in America but if Sarah was 1st generation Irish she may have picked it up in the British Isles anyway.


End file.
